DealerKnows Egg

 

Failed DealerKnows Taglines

FROM TIM WEBB (JOE’S DAD):

  • Advantage Dealer
  • DealerKnows: Dressing British, Acting Irish, Thinking Yiddish
  • Head down, shovel full
  • Think you can – you can; think you can’t – you won’t
  • Joe might have been a mistake at birth, but not hiring him to consult would be an even bigger one

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More Failed Taglines from Joe and Bill

  • Making your competition miserable
  • Joe Webb, the Christian Grey of automotive consultants
  • Bill Playford, the Charles Bronson of virtual training
  • If you have questions about your Internet department – DealerKnows
  • From our lips to your staffs fingertips
  • Tearing the stupid out of your online advertising and putting in the genius
  • Online brilliance bringing in-store results
  • Taking the Internet personally
  • Bettering the world one dealership at a time
  • Making the Internet personal
  • The Laziness Assassins
  • Do you know how to beat your competition online? DealerKnows
  • Tip #1: Just don’t punch your customers
  • Best practices for better results
  • I make money, and I really don’t love hoes.
  • Embrace technology. Hug the Internet.
  • Change how much money you make online
  • Taking online success to a whole ‘notha level
  • Just another pimp’s pincushion
  • Put your best font forward
  • Templates and Scripts and Process, oh my
  • Easily the 3rd best choice if ranking by age, looks, and nail polish color.
  • Teaching Online Skills so you can Pay Your Bills
  • Easily one of the taller choices in automotive consulting
  • Making car sales misogynistic one next-gen dealer at a time
  • Automotive Internet Training at its Sexiest
  • Immeasurable brilliance driving measurable results
  • Taxidermy
  • If your customers live online, break into their house
  • Making kickass sandwiches since 2001
  • Subs so fast, you’ll fucking shit
  • Genetically Mutating Salespeople Into Internet Superstars
  • DealerKnows: Easier than boxed macaroni and cheese
  • Orange is for prison jumpsuits
  • Growing by Leads and Bounds
  • Training dealers to use an online arsenal
  • You’re Wrong. We’re Right. DealerKnows.
  • Shift the balance of online power by 2.3X
  • The movie The Fourth Kind scared the crap out of us
  • Making Internet sales easier than my junior prom date
  • Just shut up and listen. You’ll make more money.
  • Process made perfect
  • Establishing Internet dominatrixes
  • Trust us: Were car guys.
  • S.O.S. Saving online sales
  • DealerKnows: Polygamy at its finest
  • Former adult film stars-turned-Internet trainers
  • In-the-know online all-stars
  • Teaching bad people how to take money from good people
  • R-U-N the know?
  • DealerKnows: We’re reasonably tall
  • Preparing dealers for the 23rd century
  • We thought of it first, assholes
  • Were like all the other chumps that consult, except that we’ve actually done what we are training
  • Literally, invented half the shit you’re calling new
  • DealerKnows: If cyberspace is your dealerships final frontier
  • Playing to win Internet sales
  • Forcing other consultants to leave the continent
  • Masters of finger stuffs
  • Fertile Learning from Virile Trainers in a Growingly Barren World
  • We took an impromptu trip to Bangkok with Joe Chura once
  • Zero Moment of Adultery
  • Lot of snake oil out there. DealerKnows helps you not get bit. Or well suck the venom out if you already have.
  • Making History Online
  • Driving dealer sales through the world wide Webb
  • Steam-cleaned and Without Wrinkles
  • We are anti-drugs, but we will get you high off our results
  • Please create a barrier to entry to training
  • We’ve actually done it
  • Not pretending since 2001
  • DealerKnows: We can cure hand, foot, and mouth disease
  • DealerKnows: We killed a guy once
  • Training online tactics to people who aren’t
  • Does your mom still ask about me?
  • DealerKnows: Because you obviously don’t know what the f%$k you’re doing
  • DealerKnows: Changing the culture of car sales

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